Marathon Melancholy

It’s marathon weekend here in Nashville. I’m usually buzzing in the days before the County Music Marathon and Half Marathon. I take a half day off from work on Thursday and head downtown. I normally hate to shop but I turn in to a shopaholic at the expo, buying running-related things I really don’t need. And I look forward to getting my (half) marathon shirt to add to my collection. I come home and lay out all of my stuff I’ll need for Saturday’s race. I actually construct a “race woman” on the floor and arrange everything I need in order from head to toe.

But not this year.

This morning I realized I’m sad about not being around the running folks at the expo. Yes, I could go downtown anyway. I’m registered for the half marathon, so there’s a bib and a shirt waiting for me. But I have this strange personal code. I will not wear the shirt if I didn’t run the race. So I’m saving the gasoline and cost of parking.

Tomorrow morning I’ll volunteer at the finish line from 5:30 – 11:00. I’ll forget my own bit of sadness and feel excited for the finishers. I’m volunteering because I want to honor Boston and prove to myself that hatred can’t win. I also want to volunteer as a way to say “thank you” to the countless volunteers who’ve been there through the 10 half marathons I’ve completed…so far.

I’ll allow myself to feel a little sad today.

But tomorrow, it’s all about everyone else. I bet I’ll have a ball.

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